By Kembet Bolton I had just run 1 hour straight on the treadmill in a local gym and was frantically looking for a spot to sit my butt. The only available spot was a little space in a couch where three ladies who haven’t lifted a dumbbell since they walked in sat and were chatting heartily. I squeezed myself in as I was too tired to ask for permission, the seat belongs to the gym after all. They were chatting loudly and I wasn’t sure if it was polite to listen to their conversation. I later rationalized that this wasn’t eavesdropping, as they were aware of my presence. It was an interesting conversation that kept me glued to the couch for more than thirty minutes, when normally I will only take two to three minutes break to catch my breath after an intense workout. One of the ladies, a tall…
Dear Bride Don’t Let Your Bond Fall through the Cracks
By Miracle Nwankwo I thought I would be the first bride-to-be to make history with planning a stress-free wedding, but as my big day inches closer, I have had to swallow the bitter truth that my wedding is not going to be all about me, and it involves a lot of things and people. Let’s be real, planning a wedding can be extremely stressful and can take a toll on your relationship if you are not mindful. No matter how much we thought it we would be different, and how much we had planned on keeping it cool and simple, the reality often turns out poles apart. No bride wants to go into their wedding day feeling frustrated with their partner. I don’t even want to plan a successful wedding day and then lose the bond and friendship I have built in years. It’s true that we all want to…
Does Arguing Spell Doom for Relationships?
By Kembet Bolton
Conflict is inevitable in relationships. Couples argue about all sort of issues ranging from finance to little stuff like who sleeps on what side of the bed. Conflict is not necessarily a bad thing. Every couple is going to argue. What matters is how you fight, and how those negative interactions balance out with positive interactions.
When the miles get in the way of love
By Kembet Bolton
Generally, relationships come with their ups and downs, but it becomes even tougher for a long-distance relationship. People in long-distance relationships are on a different lane from people in short-distance relationships, as the distance can create some unique challenges that might put pressure on the relationship, and if not handled carefully, can actually destroy what could have potentially been “A happy ever after’’ story
Is leaving the only solution to domestic violence?
Another Look at the Othello Syndrome
Since the coronavirus lockdown, my High School Alumni WhatsApp group has been one of my favourite pastimes. Over the last four weeks, I have spent some time catching up on chats with my homegirls, and it has been an amazing experience.
About a week ago, I read a personal experience posted by one of the girls on the group, Chinelo. It was a story about her relationship with an abusive partner, and it opened up a whole new dimension to a very much ignored aspect of spousal abuse or Intimate Partner Violence. The overwhelming response to the story from other members of the group recounting their similar experiences got me wondering; how many ladies have been through this, and how many ever got the chance to speak about it? I was also very concerned because I could Identify with Chinelo’s story, it sounded very much like my account but for a few twists.
Be Your Own Lover and Write Yourself a Love Letter
By Aditi Maheshwari To every woman this is for you: You are not always the best at expressing yourself to others because it entraps you into a feeling of guilt for outperforming or not-performing or simply for compromising on things you know you should not have. But I want you to give yourself a chance to see who you truly are. There is something incredible inside you wanting to be acknowledged by you – only you. Nobody has the power to see you the way you see yourself, so do not let this incredible authority go unravished. I can promise you a truly rewarding experience when you actually exercise this simple and readily available opportunity to unleash your true self. Lift yourself out of the crowd’s blindfolded opinions of you and others. For once at the least give yourself a reasonable opportunity to know yourself better. Wherever the secret that…
Reject Domestic Violence In All Its Forms
Domestic violence can take many forms, including physical aggression or assault (hitting, kicking, biting, shoving, restraining, slapping, throwing objects, beating up, etc.), or threats thereof; sexual abuse; controlling or domineering; intimidation; stalking; passive/covert abuse (e.g., neglect); and economic abuse. The dictionary describes domestic violence as violence committed in a domestic setting, such as in marriage or cohabitation. In this article, we’ll be looking at domestic violence in marriage. There are different types of abuse that could arise leading to domestic violence in marriage. Types of Abuse: Control. Physical Abuse. Sexual Abuse. Emotional Abuse & Intimidation. Isolation. Verbal Abuse: Coercion, Threats, & Blame. Using Male Privilege. Economic Abuse. One major or popular cause of family violence includes deeply held beliefs about masculinity. Perpetrators tend to blame other people, alcohol or circumstances for their violent outbursts. Perpetrators often minimize, blame others, justify or deny their use of violence or the impact of…