Emotions are part of us as humans. Most of the times, we take decisions based on our emotions but as much as it is a very important part of our life it is good that we have control over it and not let our feelings control us. The way we feel at certain points is quite difficult to manage especially when we have reached our breaking point. It may sometimes lead to bottling up emotions which serve as the best poison to mess up your perfectly healthy relationship, work life, and even casual friendships. How then do we get a handle on our feelings when we have reached our breaking point? How do you stop bottling up your emotions? It’s a tough practice, but I’ve got a few answers. Let’s try them out. CHECK IN WITH YOUR FEELINGS DAILY Feelings can get the better part of us sometimes but it…

Couples who are able to withstand tough times in their relationship are more likely to gain a stronger connection to one another. No relationship is void of challenges hence the importance of resilience. Resilience is simply the ability to bounce back and grow and thrive during challenges, change, and stress. The following are ways to achieve resilience in a relationship: CARE rather than confront during tough conversations. Resilient couples know how to communicate assertively — that is, in a clear, confident and controlled manner. While that’s easier said than done, particularly with tough conversations, here’s a model to help: C — Communicate the facts. A — Address your concerns in an objective way R — Reach out and ask the other person for his/her perspective E — Evaluate outcomes Most importantly, do your homework before you even have the conversation. Ask yourself whether you have an accurate understanding of the…

In our world today, many of us idealize love. We think love is the ultimate goal for all relationships and as a result of this, we tend to overlook other aspects such as respect, sacrifice, understanding, and commitment. We believe that when we love our partner it automatically fixes everything. The truth is love really isn’t enough. It requires more than pure emotions and passion to keep a relationship healthy. For a relationship to be healthy we have to incorporate respect, sacrifice, understanding, and commitment into it. PAINFUL REALITY ABOUT LOVE The problem with idealizing love is that we create this unrealistic picture in our minds and if the relationship we are in isn’t bringing that picture to reality, it makes us believe that there is something wrong with the relationship which may lead to its end. Love does not equal compatibility: falling in love with someone does not…

As ladies, there is this feeling that at a particular age, our biological clocks start ticking. This feeling prompts the search for answers to the numerous questions we ask ourselves. Some of these questions may include things like, ‘What is wrong with me’, ‘What is it I am doing wrong’, ’Am I beautiful enough’, ’Is there a particular way I should treat my man that I have not explored’, ‘Why am I not meeting the right people’. These questions are countless and more often than not rhetorical. Here are some of the reasons you still have not found the kind of relationship you desire: You’re Not Actually Looking for it You say you want love, but you’re not doing anything to actively facilitate finding it. Go out. Go out a lot. Have friends set you up. Forget the way you “thought you’d find love”. There’s a difference between chasing it…

By: Valerie Dei Remember those times when you left your spouse out on something that meant so much to him but invited your friends instead? Or the time you forgot that it was his birthday? Remember also the moments when you did some of those things you frown out. All of these times and more need a firm apology to make for a relationship without undue grudges. There are times when you may not necessarily be the one at fault, but if you value the relationship you share with your partner then you must learn to apologize and know the best way to go about it. A very important part of apologizing is acknowledging the fact that you might have done something wrong. Bearing in mind that you are from different backgrounds and respond to situations differently, do not be upset if your partner reacts in a different manner from…

By: Simone Paget There’s the popular saying that one cannot serve two masters at the same time. Materialism goes beyond buying clothes and shoes or the things we desire to have. It’s an attachment to material possessions, placing more value on the natural things (or man-made) than moral or spiritual values. Marriage, on the other hand, is a great entanglement. It is a bond that joins you and another person together and forever. Marriage takes your time and everything. In marriage you are committed to sharing your life with the other party. Both marriage and materialism are jealous lovers, and it has been said that where your treasure is there your heart will be. As a person cut in between materialism and marriage you will have to choose between the two concepts. It has been observed that the more materialistic a couple is, the less likely they are to have…

The ability to understanding your partner’s emotions is critical for a healthy romantic relationship. When you’re able to correctly identify an emotion your partner is expressing, or understand why he is feeling a certain way, you can respond to their needs more effectively. For example, by offering support or talking through a concern they might have. We all want to be seen, heard and understood. We especially want this from our partners. We want our partners to say, Yes, I am listening. Yes, I get it. Yes, I understand your pain. I’m sorry it hurts, and I am here. We want our partners to be interested in and to care about what’s happening inside our hearts.Understanding your partner in a relationship is the key to being best friends. Below, are some ways through which you can effectively achieve such an understanding. Be fully present. Are you able to listen while distracted? Chances are, probably not…